This show has been running for so long that there isn’t a single plot they haven’t tackled, so the old favourites are repeated over and over.
Tonight is no different.
Kieran reappears, and we’re not sure whether he’s just a figment of Martha’s imagination or whether he’s genuine and in desperate need of a place to crash because he’s on the run from the cops and has little money or prospects.
I’m guessing it’s a mix of the two, since Kieran is a cruel character who will flee if Martha informs Alf and Roo that she has seen him. Plus, when somebody is at their most crazy, the producers always use the Jas cam technique, which was not used on this occasion, much to my delight.
In any case, Martha has a meeting with her councillor, and everyone is worried about her mental health.
Alf, on the other hand, “doesn’t give a damn what the doctors think” and whisks her away against doctors’ orders to the restaurant, where everyone will “stare” at her.
“Martha is my wife,” says the narrator. Alf yells, “I told her she could come home, and that’s exactly what’s going to happen.”
Alf’s stubborn and old-fashioned beliefs will still enrage people after 33 years. What a talent.
Martha expresses her dissatisfaction by saying, “I feel so lost.”
Alf tries to assist Martha by driving her back to her “art” van, figuring that cleaning it out could help her clear her mind.
When Martha tells Roo and Alf she has to do it alone (they already know it’s not a “art” van), Kieran and his craggy face are standing there in the same clothes.
At the surfing club, Susie is going all out to organise a surf competition to raise money and spruce up the house, i.e. steal the cash.
According to Susie, there is only “one teeny, tiny problem.” I have a few gripes that I’ll air in a minute.
They don’t know where to put the money because the club treasurer is away for the time being, so Susie opens a new bank account in her name.
My first concern is who will compete in the surf competition. But I remember how low the bar is in the episode because Willow thinks Ziggy can join (they’re “friends” again) and even Justin’s name is mentioned. Yes, Justin, the guy who was writhing in agony and coated in tumours that threatened to paralyse him only a few weeks ago.
Susie has earned almost $10,000, which cannot be real because the only businesses in town are the cafe, which Irene would not donate, the garage, which Justin has just scraped together all of his money for a house deposit, and there is no mention of Jas, the gym owner, contributing.
Even though they will be making “sacrifices” to make the repayments, Justin and Leah give Susie a big fat cheque for their house deposit thanks to a “private lender” or scammer.
Let’s face it, Leah has already lost one house to fire, and now she’s about to lose another.
Irene is the only one who can see Susie’s true colours.
“Something tells me real estate Barbie isn’t everything she’s cracked up to be,” Irene says, giving me a new nickname.
Irene speaks with John about Susie and warns him.
Since John is incapable of thinking for himself, he informs Susie.
She rushes over to Irene’s house, threatening her and insinuating that Irene wants to date John, which I’m happy to report has already been debunked.
Susie responds, “Trust me, Irene, you don’t want to mess with me.”
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